Bing’s story | The people at church had something I didn’t have

“You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart.” (Jeremiah 29:13)

“I grew up in a small town in Sarawak, Borneo Island. We were a very big family. I had 13 siblings! My parents were rubber farmers, and they went to work by boat. It took them a whole day to reach the rubber plantation. It meant I didn’t see them. I remember feeling sad and angry about this, especially towards my mum. I was raised by my sister.

We went to church, as children, because our house was near the church. I liked the stories of the Bible, but as a teenager I thought church was boring, and I stopped going. Then, at age 15, I started to question. What is the point of life? What are we here for? I wanted to find out about the meaning of life and why there was so much suffering. Sometimes, I would go and visit the hospital. I saw people sick and dying, but I didn’t find the answers. I also wanted to leave Sarawak and go to Australia, but I wasn’t proficient in English, so I went to England instead, to study my undergrad, a degree in science.

I was in a bad shape in London. I was lost and lonely. I didn’t sleep for three months. It was a huge culture shock. I had no one to speak to, in my mother tongue. After some time, a few Christians reached out to me. They invited me to Bible Study. I longed for friendship, so I went with them. I joined the Bible Study, and I attended their church. Several months later, my friend said to me, “Do you know that you are a sinner?” I said to her, “I’m not a sinner! Surely, I am not that bad?” She then added that the Bible said that we are all sinners, ‘For all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God.’ (Roman 3:23).

I thought I should take a serious look at this so-called Christianity. Another friend, knowing my interest, lent me several books and I read them all. Then I joined a summer conference. I realized that I was with a group of smiling people. They had something which I didn’t have. God seemed real to them! There was a man playing a song. The words were from Psalm 84, “Better is one day in your courts than a thousand elsewhere.”

That verse really struck me. What does it mean for us to be in the presence of God? Why is being in God’s presence a thousand times better than being anywhere else?

It made me start to think. At that time, I also read a lot of CS Lewis’s books – The Problem of Pain, Mere Christianity, Surprised by Joy, The Screwtape Letters. It all made sense to me!

There is a God, and I couldn’t flee from him. We are here on earth to know him and enjoy him forever. If we trust in Jesus, we can be forgiven, by him. We can be whole!

I became a Christian. It was 36 years ago, and it was the best thing I ever did. The first thing I did was forgive my mum. It’s the power of the word of God. From Luke 6:37, ‘Forgive, and you will be forgiven.’ We have been forgiven and so we can forgive. Then, I made a priority to attend church, Bible Study and prayer meeting. What a blessing it has been! Now I realise that all that time, while I was growing up, I was longing for meaning. I thought I would find meaning overseas, but all that time, I was really longing for God!

My favourite verse is in Jeremiah 29:13, “You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart.” I believe it’s true that God answers our deepest longings. The more we seek him and trust him, the more he answers. He really speaks! The more I read the Bible, the more I build my relationship with God. It’s been the best thing that has ever happened to me!”

Bing’s story is part of the Faith Stories series, compiled by Naomi Reed.

Visit Koorong to purchase Naomi’s Faith Stories book, Every Moment, Everywhere: https://koorong.com/everymoment